Fretting: The Uninvited Guest at Life's Party & How to Politely Show It the Door!

"Do not fret—it leads only to evil." This powerful command from Psalm 37:8 warns against an emotion that is often dismissed as harmless, but biblically, fretting is far more dangerous than we realize. To fret means to be agitated, anxious, or consumed by worry and frustration. While many in Christendom understand the need to turn from anger—since forgiveness is a core tenet of Christianity—the subtle emotion of fretting is often overlooked. Yet this verse tells us clearly: fretting only leads to evil. It doesn’t say it’s a mildly bad or manageable feeling; it is declared to be a pathway that inevitably leads to destructive outcomes. This means that fretting is a far bigger issue than we often acknowledge.

Fretting might seem like a mild form of worry, but it's more insidious because it eats away at our peace and faith. It looks like constantly replaying frustrating conversations in your mind, becoming consumed by other people's success or wrongdoing, or allowing small irritations to grow into big anxieties.

Don't Let Worry Wreck Your World.

Fretting creates a cycle of negativity, leading us to distrust God’s plan and seek control over our circumstances. When we stew over what’s out of our hands—be it the unfairness of others, personal setbacks, or uncertainty about the future—we step into a dangerous space where sin can take root.

Proverbs 14:30 echoes this when it says, "A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones." Fretting causes a slow decay of our spiritual life, robbing us of inner peace, joy, and trust in God's sovereignty.

The truth that fretting "leads only to evil" shows how serious it is. Fretting may begin as subtle frustration, but it quickly morphs into destructive behaviors:

When we fret, we stop trusting in God's timing. Abraham and Sarah fretted over their childlessness, leading them to make a poor decision by having Abraham father a child with Hagar, causing strife and consequences that lingered for generations (Genesis 16).

Fretting often stirs up envy. Consider Cain in Genesis 4:6-8. His fretting over God’s favor toward Abel led to jealousy, which escalated to anger and ultimately murder. Fretting allowed resentment to fester until it became uncontrollable rage.

The Israelites, despite witnessing God’s miracles in the wilderness, frequently fretted about their circumstances. In Exodus 16:2-3, they grumbled against Moses and God, wishing they could return to Egypt. This led to disobedience and idolatry, showing that fretting can drive people to rebel against God.

Fretting not only leads to outward sin, but it also reveals a lack of faith. Philippians 4:6 commands us, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." 

When we fret, we act as though God is not in control or is not good enough to handle our problems. This lack of trust can eventually lead to outright rebellion against God’s will.

Jesus warns us against fretting in Matthew 6:31-34 when He says, "So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?'... Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Fretting is a form of worry that distracts us from seeking first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness. When we fret, we lose focus on God's provision and become preoccupied with earthly concerns, inviting evil thoughts and actions.

So how do we overcome fretting? Psalm 37:7 provides the answer: "Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for Him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes." The solution to fretting is to place our full trust in God, waiting patiently for His justice, His timing, and His provision. It means surrendering our frustrations and anxieties to Him and refusing to let worry or anger take root.

The apostle Peter encourages us with similar words in 1 Peter 5:7: "Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you." 

Fretting is a form of misplaced control.

When we cast our anxieties on God, we allow Him to deal with our circumstances, rather than letting our frustrations spiral into evil.

On my desk, I keep a simple note that reads, "Worship before emotions." It’s a small but powerful reminder for me, especially when I feel emotions like worry, doubt, or frustration creeping in. Emotions are tricky—there are so many "cousins" to anger, fret, and doubt, and they all come wrapped in feelings that can easily overwhelm us. Our mind becomes the battlefield where Satan tries to gain ground, using these emotions to cloud our judgment and shift our focus from God.

Whenever I sense any emotion starting to fester—whether it’s anxiety, uncertainty, or fear—I’ve made it a habit to stop what I’m doing and change my environment. I’ll get up, walk around the house, and consciously put myself in a posture of worship. It doesn’t have to be loud or dramatic; it’s not about shouting or making a big display. It’s about realigning myself with the truth of who God is and how big He is. Sometimes, it’s as simple as walking through a few rooms, quietly worshipping God, reminding myself of His sovereignty, His goodness, and His faithfulness.

Worship is Your Weapon Against Worry.

Worship, in those moments, becomes my anchor. It lifts me out of the temporary emotion that’s trying to take over and brings me back into God’s presence. Instead of letting those feelings dictate my mindset, I turn my focus to God, recognizing that He is greater than any worry or doubt I might be feeling. It’s not just an act of worship, but a recalibration—a way to reset my heart and mind, to bring them back into alignment with the truth of God's Word, rather than the lies of the enemy.

Isaiah 26:3 reminds me, "You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you." Worship keeps my mind steadfast, guarding me from letting emotions rule, and brings peace back into focus.

Fretting may seem harmless, but scripture reveals its dangers: it leads to impatience, envy, anger, distrust, and ultimately, sin. God calls us to trust in Him completely, to rest in His plan, and to refuse to let the small irritations or injustices of life consume us. In doing so, we escape the trap of fretting and experience the peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7).

Heavenly Father,

I come before You, grateful for Your presence and the peace that You promise to give us in all circumstances. Lord, You know how easily our hearts can get overwhelmed by worry, fear, and doubt. Fretting creeps in when we focus on the challenges before us, but today, I ask for Your strength to choose differently. Help me and my reader to remember that You are greater than any circumstance that we face, and that no problem is too big for You.

Your Word tells us to "fret not," for it only leads to evil. So when our emotions start to stir—when worry, anxiety, and doubt begin to fester—teach us to pause and turn our hearts toward worship. May we lift our eyes to You instead of focusing on our problems. Remind us to walk through our home or office, quietly declaring Your goodness, Your power, and Your faithfulness. Whether it’s in song, prayer, or even silence, let our worship realign our hearts with Your truth.

Lord, we release our need to control and our tendency to fret. Replace those anxious feelings with a deeper trust in You. Help us to see that every emotion is an opportunity to bring our focus back to You, knowing that You are our refuge, our strength, and our ever-present help in trouble.

Thank You, Father, for the peace that surpasses all understanding. Help us to apply this daily, so that we can live from a place of worship instead of worry. We trust You with our emotions, our circumstances, and our future. In Jesus' name, Amen.

© 2024 Amanda Allen. All rights reserved.

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